Wednesday, January 18, 2012

Conversations

Conversations that happen when an irish man dates an american...or just me.





me: did you finish going to the bathroom? i need to take a bath
stephen: yes, but wait a second..
me: what are you doing in there?
stephen: nothing..just wait
me: did you poop on the floor?
stephen: noooo. what are you saying?
me: what are you doing with a plastic bag? i can hear it
stephen: nothing..just wait
me: did you clog the toilet??
stephen: Nooo..stop asking me questions
me: did you poop on the floor and are cleaning it up with a plastic bag?
stephen: what are the likes of you? really.
me: dont get all irish on me
stephen: what are you gonna do?
me: get american on your ass
stephen: ok sorry.
me: what are you doing in there?
stephen: oh my gosh, just give me a second pet and then you can come in
me: can i come in now?
stephen: ok yes. 




me: ohhh babe..sorry for accusing you of pooping on the floor. you’re the best.
stephen: you are crazy.



stephen: you are really chammin over there arnt you?
me: i didnt say anything..
stephen: no..your chewing..its so loud
me: im eating flaming hot cheetos
stephen: why so loudly?
me: because they are crunchy?
stephen: but can you close your mouth to eat them?
me: no. they are flaming hot.
stephen: so?
me: if i close my mouth, my mouth gets too hot. i have to let air in.
stephen: right..
me: flaming hot cheetos makes me cough
stephen: isnt that my bag of cheetos?
me: yes. but i ate it.
stephen: well then im going to get one of yours.
me: no, thats my bag.
stephen: but you ate one of mine..
me: i know..and now you dont have anymore left..that sucks.
stephen: but you have one of yours left..
me: but thats mine.
stephen: so basically if we get 5, 10, or 100 bags of flaming hot cheetos from the import store they are all yours?
me: correct. good talk.


me: i want to make an egg salad sandwhich for lunch
stephen: but we dont have any salad
me: ya i just want egg salad
stephen: but we dont have lettuce
me: thats okay. I just want the egg salad sandwhich
stephen: without salad?
me: yea. just the sandwhich. no salad on the side.
stephen: why are you calling it egg salad?
me: what is happening with this conversation?
stephen: what is egg salad?
me: egg, mayo, on bread...
stephen: so no salad?
me: right.
stephen: then why are you calling it an egg salad sandwhich if there is no salad on it?
me:  a. its called lettuce, and b. because im american.




see other conversations here, here, here and here

89 comments:

  1. This post is so funny and sweet all at the same time!

    I discovered Dr Pepper and Cherry Coke at the British store near my work this morning. At the cashier I said "I wonder if there are any American stores around here." The lady said "I don't think so." I said "My friend lives in Ireland and they have an American store there. She can get pop tarts and flaming hot Cheetos and cheez its and everything. I would freak out if I could find something like that here."

    Then the lady was like "we used to have pop tarts, but don't any more" and then I stormed out.

    xxx
    Jenna

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  2. Hahaha I'm totally with him on that egg salad thing ;)

    By the way, I don't know if they ship to the UK but this online store saved me when I was going through North American food withdrawal ;)

    www.cometeshop.com

    Bisous!

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  3. You got yourself a keeper there megs. I always love these convo post, so funny and sweet!

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  4. Candles AND a bath??

    That guy you have is the WORST.

    ;)

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  5. Wooah! Look at the romantic ambiance going down in that bathroom!! Such a sweet gesture :)

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  6. I seriously can't handle these conversations!!! I can't read these at work anymore. I look like an idiot! the flaming hot cheetos omg hahaha I love your dry sense of humor - it's my favorite kind! :)

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  7. You and Stephen are amazing ha I see his point, and yet, I also see yours. IN EVERY SCENARIO. I feel as though this Australian thing is so handy.

    Another amazing blog :-)

    As a side note, your blog inspired me to plan a Europe 12/13 trip that now involves a whole lot of UK+Ireland!!! Yeeeeeeeeah travel!

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  8. I love these little updates! How awesome does that bathroom look? Lucky lady you with candles and all!

    Sal x

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  9. So cute. you two must always be laughing and smiling.
    http://inthekitchenandonthecouch.blogspot.com/
    Meghan

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  10. These convos are the. best.
    and he decorated with candles?! oh my gosh. Totally cute.

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  11. Bahahaha. These conversations make my day. Seriously. And I hope you apologized more than once for accusing him of pooping on the floor ;)

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  12. cheetos make me cough!!!!!!!!!!! AHHH! I love you for this.

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  13. Here salad doesn't necessarily imply that lettuce is involved. If you order a tomato and onion salad They brings you those two ingredients chopped up together... sans lettuce. If you want lettuce, you have to tell them to add lettuce. And even the salads that come with lettuce here at restaurants trying to be more American are normally drowned in mayonnaise. Luckily, I'm almost purely carnivorous and have no need for 5-7 veggies servings a day.

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  14. Thank you for the laugh!!!! I soooo know what you mean about having conversations with your man....my hubby is South African- it's a delight and a challenge to communicate some things...especially very American things!

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  15. Please stop being so funny. When I laugh my back hurts. I LOVE THESE POSTS!!!

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  16. On. The. Floor! That is HILARIOUS!
    Super sweet for the candles!
    Much love, Bailey from Vanilla Blonde

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  17. "it's called lettuce" - HAHAHA! This post cracks me up! I can relate; however, my husband is American but the communication is still sometimes off.

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  18. these lost in translation moments are priceless. seriously. I read them to myself in my head, switching back and forth from an Irish accent to my American "accent."

    it's a good time. thanks.

    xoxo

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  19. You do realize how jealous you are making us girls wishing we had an Ireland bf.....

    Just saying!!

    Lol :-)

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  20. hahahah!!! omg i just died. you totally asked him if he pooped on the floor! hahahaha! you are awesome!

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  21. You two are so funny! I love the reference to Sh*t Girls Say....Cheetos make me cough...haha!

    Um cute with the candles btw. Irish man's points just keep going up and up....

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  22. YES. I love every single one of these. and did you really accuse him of pooping on the floor?!? that is so amazing!

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  23. Haha so cute!!! I just love your conversations! :)

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  24. I just had to keep myself from busting out laughing at this, so people at work wouldn't think I'm crazy. Please give us more snippets of conversations between you guys. That was just great. :)

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  25. Not gonna lie, Lance and I had a similar conversation when he introduced egg salad sandwich to me.

    And 2 years later I had the same exact combo with my mom as I introduced it to her. #foreignsforthewin

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  26. Meg, you should seriously consider putting this all together and publishing a book. I'd buy it.

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  27. Hot cheetos convo = sh*t girls say...lol!!

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  28. I love these posts. I'm always in tears from laughing. And if it makes you feel any better or helps in any way... I had that egg salad sandwich conversation just the other day with a friend. an american friend.

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  29. I'm obsessed with these conversations posts. :)

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  30. Too funny, I love LOVE reading these conversations!! xoxo

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  31. God I love you. DId you poop on the floor?! hahahaha I'm dying!!

    And the "My mouth gets too hot" hahaha You kill me!!

    You were definitely the best part of my morning :)

    Sabrina Says

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  32. ok, the candles thing? stop it stephen. you are too good.

    and i LOL'd (and i do that maybe once every three months reading blogs. seriously) at the

    "i know... and now you don't have anymore left. that sucks."

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  33. I OOOOOOOOOOOO-ED out loud from the candles picture. Isn't he just the sweetest thing!

    Makes you think twice about bringing up poop again, doesn't it? ;)
    Emily at Amazing Grapes

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  34. you kids. cracking me up. also, the candles in the bathroom? bowchickawowwow ;)

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  35. These are my favorite posts. Because I have similar conversations with my boyfriend, but we're from the same place. So it's much more frustrating! Lol.

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  36. Sexxxxxyyyy timmmmmmeee!!! How incredibly sweet of him. :) Shame on you for your accusations of floor poopage.

    Halfway through this post I realized that I was, literally, beaming at my computer screen. Like, a huge ridiculous smile on my face. It's what you do to me Megan. :)

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  37. Seriously these convos are EPIC! I'm so glad you are recording them for your future Irish American baybays! :) I have to let air in...good talk.

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  38. I was imagining a horror scene while reading through the first conv. So glad it was just romance.

    And proper hot cheeto eating etiquette is to let air in. Mouth will explode otherwise. Safety first.

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  39. Hahahaha Megan, your conversations with Stephen are so freaking funny.

    And let me just say THANK YOU because I've had a bad past several days and this post instantly put a smile on my face. Just what I needed right now. You're the best!

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  40. YOU rock. Your conversations are the best...I can't even handle it. Tell Stephen I say hello and thanks for stealing you today so we can't skype ;) kidding.

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  41. HAHAHA! "Sorry for accusing you of pooping on the floor." HAHA!

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  42. I think Stephen makes a good point about egg salad sammies--- i mean there really is no lettuce...? right? smart man.
    double smart with the candles.

    what a hunk. ;)

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  43. kinda kills the romance a bit when you're being accused of pooping on the floor, huh? you're hilarious!!

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  44. Oh my goodness. That pooping on the floor thing has me in stitches! So funny!

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  45. I love how accusing him of pooping on the floor turned into a seriously awesome bath set up for you. Like I've said before....KEEEEEEEPER!

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  46. "I'm sorry for accusing you of pooping on the floor!!" Bahaha, I never even would've thought of that!! What a sweet boyfriend you have!

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  47. Ah I love these conversations; keep 'em coming!
    And that bathroom thing is the cutest!!

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  48. New follower here...and can I just say, you two are hilarious. Accusing him of pooping on the floor sounds like something I would do to my husband.

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  49. I love you! HAHAHA I'm at work right now and I just kept smiling bigger and bigger as I read this. You two are precious. I just love it. And that candle thing you got goin on in your bathroom? Heaven. What an awesome dude. :)

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  50. Ahhhhhh, I love all the candles! What a sweetie! He totally should have pooped on the floor, just to satisfy your curiosity. Haha.

    These convos rock.

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  51. I could not stop laughing! Y'all're cute.

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  52. I love your conversations. They're so funny!

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  53. i almost couldn't read these conversations because i just wanted to stare at that picture of you two. not creepy. it's like a great work of art.

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  54. posts like this make me wish I had:
    1. a bathroom that had a tub and wasn't the size of a postage stamp
    2. a thoughtful irishman
    3. cheetos....well honestly I'm more a bbq chip girl but when stuck overseas i'll settle for some cheeto-goodness.

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  55. HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHHAHAHHA i just died at the bathroom conversation. laughing so hard

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  56. I loved that first one. What a great surprise!!

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  57. I'm new to your blog and am thoroughly enjoying myself here! You are hilarious! Thanks for the laugh.

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  58. hahahahahah! Laughed so hard! I love these posts. :) One of my favorites! And how sweet that he set that up for you!

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  59. So funny. haha I love these conversations. And loving how sweet he was to set up the room like that! Gorg!

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  60. My husband calls Lettuce "Salad" too! and I just don't get it.

    He also calls directions "way descriptions" which makes me laugh. I didn't understand why until in my german class i learned that the german word for directions directly translates to way description in english

    honestly it's adorable.

    http://thoserootsandwings.blogspot.com

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  61. 1. he may be the most adorable man ever!
    2. you two crack me up, my guy and i have conversations like that all the time

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  62. This is so funny! I think I found the egg salad one the most amusing...the complications of cultural barriers!

    ♥ LW

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  63. Oh my god... cracking up. Love the hot cheeto convo.

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  64. hahahahaha This is hilarious!

    I totally relate to Stephen though when it comes to the salad thing. My husband often goes to this cafe for lunch and get this dish with lots of fatty cheese, bacon, ranch dressing and all kinds of stuff. I think the fact that somewhere buried under all the grease and fat there's a leaf of lettuce gives him the right to call the said dish a "salad".

    Oh you American people.

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  65. Thank you for having these hilarious conversations! Made me laugh so hard. Again, thank you!

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  66. MEGAN. YOUR MAN. I SERIOUSLY CAN NOT GET OVER IT.

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  67. Well, I think he really did poop on the floor because really- what guy is THAT romantic. It just wouldn't be fair.

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  68. I can't believe he wanted you to put your mouth in danger of combustion like that!

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  69. you guys are the cutest ever!! wishing you both an exciting new year!!

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  70. Hah! This made me laugh so much. Especially the bit about egg salad. It is indeed a confusing thing, I suppose, if you're not used to it!

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  71. hahaha. this is hilarious! especially the egg salad conversation.

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  72. i'm not sure how i missed this post....but seriously with the first conversation? hahahaha.

    you would be the girl who ruins her own engagement or something by asking too many questions. a la kate hudson in bride wars (embarrassing reference, but go with it).

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  73. I read this at work and was trying so hard not to laugh out loud that I snorted! It was so great!

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  74. that is so not poop on the floor, that is AMAZING on the floor!

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  75. Haha love the cheetos part!

    With Love.
    Monica

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  76. I bloody love these posts, crack me up! HA about him trying to be all romantic and you accusing him of pooping on the floor!! I surprised Whit with candles & a bath once too :) & that is hilarious about an egg salad sandwich!

    M x

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  77. I'm Irish and we say egg salad here, in reference to what you were actually talking about. Tell your boyfriend he is silly haha

    Love these conversations!

    LolaDee
    www.loladee.com

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  78. @Lola- gonna have to strongly disagree on that one..or at least my bf does..and wikapedia, which i looked up to try and prove him wrong...but it does say in britain and ireland egg salad is "mixed greens with a side of egg"

    maybe its a british vs republic thing?

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  79. I know I've told you before about how MUCH I love your blog...
    But, I just HAD to come back and re-read this post.
    LOVE the "did you poop on the floor" part!!
    So, the other night I'm retelling that part of your post to my family.
    In the car.
    My hubs and kids were ROLLING!!
    Well, not really and TRULY rolling because that would be awkward. In the car and all.
    But we were seriously in stitches of laughter!
    You are a delight!!
    Have a great day today.
    Or tomorrow.
    Or whatever it is across the pond. ;)

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  80. i am reading through all of these and dying. the poop on the floor has to be the best though.

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  81. i am reading through all of these and dying. the poop on the floor has to be the best though.

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Thank you so much for taking the time to comment! I read and try to respond to every one! I will either respond in the comment section or directly through e mail :)

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