I dont want to brag or anything..
but Bridget and I are basically bffs.
It's a fact.
I'm just publicly announcing it.
We have late night chat sessions while baby Parker is on the boob
long streams of e mails..
we get personal..
no big deal.
Now she is about to get personal with you..
with her amazing first kiss story that i'm pretty sure most of the poor teenagers living inside us can relate to..
When Megan took talking about our first time in the sack off the table, I was really close to bagging the whole guest-posting deal and being like, "Why you hatin' on fornicatin'?" But, I like Meg, so I stuck around and I'll talk about a way less juicy first, but still a fun one.
My first kiss.
Like first first. Not first with Steve. Cause first with Steve (and that's my husband for those who don't know me) wasn't that earth-shattering. I mean, it blew my mind cause he was the man formerly known as (not Prince, folks) my professor. And he was a great kisser and all. But, it's not like a major story.
Neither is my first kiss, really, but it has all the anxious drama of a seventh-grade-crush so I figure it's a worth a share.
So, like I said, I was in seventh grade. My only kiss story prior to this was in fourth grade when my boyfriend (and then, that meant I like stole his hat during recess and we passed notes back and fourth) kissed me on the cheek at the D.A.R.E. dance. I was dressed as Pebbles Flinstone and he was a werewolf and at the time IT WAS THE BIGGEST THING THAT'D EVER HAPPENED TO ME.
Anyway, fast forward. Seventh grade. Another dance. This time it's a birthday party at a rented-out hall (lucky bitches, the ones whose parents loved them enough to rent out a hall for their birthday party). I am in seventh-grade-LOVE with a boy named John. Everybody knows this, including him, and my friend Carly comes up to me all, "Hey, you wanna hook-up with John tonight?" Nervous giggle. "Yeah!" (Oh my gosh, did I really just say yeah is he gonna say yeah back oh my gosh what if he doesn't want to kiss me back oh my gosh how do i kiss do i just open my mouth and move my tongue around what if his braces cut my tongue oh my gosh does anyone have binaca i need some right now just in case this happens and what song will play when we finally do this thing). That was the stream of conciousness of a seventh grade girl about to have her first kiss in case you didn't know.
So, Carly talks to John. There was always a go-between then, you know? So, as I was saying, Carly talks to John who says yes and then she comes back to talk to me who says, "OMG," and then it's decided. The next slow song, he's asking me to dance. So, all the girls shuffle into the bathroom where I totally get Binaca'd up and I go back out there, sweaty-palmed and all, ready for my first kiss.
The next slow song starts. My knees are weak. It's Celine Dion's "My Heart Will Go On." Since I can't be with Leo (that's DiCaprio), it might as well be John. He asks me to dance. My palms are sweaty. I say yes. We start dancing with all the kissing-committee-members around us watching and waiting for us to lock lips. Sure enough, we do. Totally the mouth-stuck-together-tongues-swishing-around thing. As I look back I'm like, "Really Bridge?! You kissed that way?" Yes. Didn't we all?
And that was it. I walked out of that rented hall with my head held a little higher. Girlfriend had lost her kissing virginity. Now out of my way, folks! Got a bona-fide kisser comin' through!
for the love of Goodness if you dont follow her